Saturday, May. 08, 2004 - 20:27

Hello to you, gentle Reader.

I had a rather peculiar dream yesterday. Had a ‘nana’ nap prior to going to work, and when I woke from it I was sweating like a Lucy Loosebox (well known local drag identity, known for her perspiration factor when performing), jolted into consciousness by this awful dream.

I was on a farm or something… it was daylight and I was wandering around outside when I was approached by the guard dog: - a HUGE Great Dane, black as night. The dog’s head was as big as a rhino’s! It seemed none-too-friendly, and I knew I didn’t have a chance of running from it, muchless winning over its friendship. I deiced to stand my ground against the beast (got to love the symbolism). It lunged at me and as it did so, I inserted both of my arms up its nostrils, right up to my elbows (cannot begin to tell you how unpleasantly squishy it was! Ick!).

So we’re standing there, eye-balling one another, with me up to my elbows in dog snot, doing this weird kind of dance; I was determined to keep my arms up its nose figuring that it would be unable to take a bite out of me…. which, I guess, makes a weird kind of sense really: would you be inclined/able to bite someone if they had their arms up your nose? I think not.

However, in the dream I realised that this stand off was going to have to come to an end; I couldn’t go the rest of my life with a Great Dane attached to my arms after all – how on earth would I be able to do my hair, for example?

I was filled with dread and terror as it hit me I was going to have to remove my arms and deal with the beast head-on…. And that’s where I woke up. Trippy, eh?

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